aflaminghalo: (Default)
♣ Don't think my contract is going to be extended. Diana is going on holiday on tuesday for 3 1/2 weeks and hasn't spoken of it since. I'm not really bothered, I just would have prefered her not to say anything until they'd made a decision one way or the other.

♣ And we have moved back down to reception again. I shall have to wait out the last of my contract Markless. He really is such a pretty pretty man. I am 90% sure he's gay and taken though.

♣ New York is happening, we are all booked at getting it finalised. Nice thing is, now I can start buying my dollars while the excange rate is so wonderfully low.

♣ Actually, I did go and get £60 worth of dollars at the Post Office ($115) and the woman asked me if I was going on a college trip there. Which pleased me.

♣ My head hurts, I missed the piercing shop by about 20 minutes (damn you late running hairdressers/rain/bus/traffic combo) and I have nothing to do tonight even though I want to. So I made a community. [ profile] sparksandsnikts It's a Wolverine/Jubilee comm. I'm getting back to my fandom roots.

♣ The tagline on my lj is "like a heartbeat baby, trying to wake up", I keep thinking about it. I'm not even trying anymore. I lack any mechanism for self-starting. I need to move out, I need to get a proper job, I need to get my head fixed, I need to just sort myself out in the most basic of ways. And I don't know how and it freaks me out. Any advise oh wonderful oracles of the lj lands? I just want to be a real live boy...
aflaminghalo: (Default)

Dcotors it shall have to be then.

My breathing is better, but i keep getting dizzy spells when stood up. And my glands are so swollen I feel like I'm smuggling kinder eggs in my throat, which incidentally is a lovely shade of aggravated red.

Swollowing is also a thing of fantasies...

grr, i want to go home and go to sleep, but i have no bedroom at home, cause of my stupid sister and the slow ass work men, and the one here is just ick still.
aflaminghalo: (Default)
Oh God...
Have given up caffeine.
Head pounding.
I hate you all.

Even you.
Actually, especially you.

~crawls off to darkened corner~
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Its just too too hot. :( Seriously, I think I'm melting.

Actually, I love hot weather here, like this. Makes the world feel like its sat on the edge of something important, or atleast I am.

Yayness, my AOS books are here.

"Leaving aside all unreal dreams, consider this world as insincere disbelief.
Lo this day salvation has come. My 'I and Self' has agreed in belief."

Oh, and help me, I can't decide between a tongue or lip piercing. hoom.
aflaminghalo: (Default)
What is it with people.
They're friendly, nice, they actaully listen to you.
And then one day, I dunno. They smile at you, or say something or just look at you in a particluar way.
And suddenly you're not your own person any more.

And you talk more, and do stuff together and just have a nice time, all the while you're starting to feel more and more for theis person, who you believe, because you have to, likes you too.

And then suddenly, the cool kids come back and you're relegated to the back of the crowd. They don't talk to you anymore, they don't listen. And you don't do anything together.

And the only person it hurts is you.
aflaminghalo: (Default)
She had always been tough, but there were some things one just did not overcome. Some scrapes you could not brush off and chalk up as a lesson learned. Some pain was forever.

and some just feels like it.

Thats the bit I hate. You lose that last pain somewhere deep inside where you can barely feel it....and then you go out chasing a new one.
I'm so tired of that.
I wish, that for just once, it didn't end like that.
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